Ewan Quotes

• “Mom, fire has three powers- 1.- Fire has the power to kill people, 2.- Fire’s second power is to melt marshmellow, 3.- Fire has the power to melt wax into water.”
• ” My Mom is part Scottish and part suburban”.
• “Mom, I love peace and quiet, it is the the best thing I have ever had”.  I find this hilarious because Ewan is the loudest thing in our house and there is never any peace and quiet.
• ” Mom, did Anwen come out of your penis”?  My Answer was no, I don’t have a penis.
• “I love pooping”
• “I’m gonna go to sleep and dream of storm troopers and sticks”
• ” You stop being angry at me young lady”  said to me;)
• “I accidentally called you an idiot, but I am sorry”
• ” Daddy, I have a pointy booger in my nose.”
• Ewan’s answer to- Why do girls pee sitting down? ” Because their penises are not on the front of them.”
• What does Ewan think that IRON MAN does to his enemies, “He irons them”.
• “Momma what is this”, reluctantly I tell him that it is a tampon.  ”Momma is a tampon candy, is it a sucker?” No!
• A question asked to Ewan, What do you use a tooth pic for?  Ewan answers with a tooth pic in his mouth, “To be cool”.
• Ewan tells me what he wants Santa to bring him for christmas maybe three times a week, every time it is different, this is what he told me most recently.  ”I want a violin and a robot”, “do you think Santa’s elves can make those”?
• Ewan’s new line is “Speaking of…” .  ”Speaking of bars, when I visit auntie Meghan’s bar I am gonna ask for a ice cold root beer float!”
• “Mom, why is church always about God, why can’t it be about something else.” We ask like what Ewan, “like Legos”.
• ” I can’t stand it when you don’t let me win” Ewan on playing board games.
• When it was suggested to Ewan that two of his action figures could share one aircraft his reply was, “but if they share then they won’t be able to keep their schedules”.
• “That burp tasted yummy”.
• “Please let me brush your pretty ponies hair, here I will trade you snake eyes”  This is Ewan negotiating with Anwen.
• “Why does rich mean you have a lot of pennies”?
• “I want a mommy that has more color and style.”  When asked to elaborate Ewan told us that he wanted me to be black, but he rescinded the part about style.
• “Momma can I play in peace”  translated means, leave me alone.
• “Can we get a bigger house so that we don’t have to let other people have our stuff”?
• “Why do I always have to sit in time out when I am being really rude”?
• “You can’t make me do that dumb stuff”. ( I, being mom certainly have a differing opinion on that.)
• We were looking at pictures of Anwen just after she had been born and Ewan asked me this; “Did Anwen come out with a blanket”?
• I don’t look cool in short sleeved pants (shorts), I don’t look awesome!!  You can’t make me wear them.